Friday, December 31, 2010

Epiphany: LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE!

Epiphany: LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE!: "2010 is almost gone or should i say gone? Its been a great year and am sure we all have our experience like other years past, from that unbo..."

LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE!

2010 is almost gone or should i say gone? Its been a great year and am sure we all have our experience like other years past, from that unborn child, to the Okada man, that dream filled student, the young teenager trying to figure out what is really cool, the graduate trying to settle for a white collar job....the business men and women in Onitsha, Alaba, Aba or let say everywhere, those trying hard to climb up the corporate ladder, the old man forgotten in one remote village, superstars and our darling politicians, whether you won or lost.....whoever you are, where ever you are, you surely can relate with 2010, you have your story!
Do not be caught in the web of making resolutions again, if you are not committed to making your everyday better,you probably be caught in the same cycle,hoping, planning but nothing happens. You just keep practicing positive thinking, reading all the good books with the best of intentions, following Donald Trump on being an apprentice....great way to live but you just have to do something about what you already know. Be tired...so tired!
Do not let anything hold you back, go all out and do your thing..live your life and commit yourself to living your best life. This is not about money, its just a thing of choice. Face what is not working in your life and stand up for yourself. yeah! do it for yourself....make yourself happy, stop making excuses for things that are keeping you back. Quit planning, now is time to do. Thats the difference, knowing what you want, thinking it trough and doing something about it. Act on what you already know.
2011 is here, make it count for you. Commit yourself to what you believe in to be true. Find the courage to be alive, make your choice and live your life. Its going to be a challenge but trust me, its going to be worth it. Lets stop blaming the economy, the government, our backgrounds for things that happen to us. its your life and you have to take responsibility for that.
lets stop worrying about what goes on in other people's lives and face our own, lets stop wondering why Beyonce is not pregnant, or why Rhianna has changed or how someone is badly dressed, how they spend their money....come down from your high seat of judgment and criticism and live your own life. Mind your business! The time we spend trying to fix other people's business, gossip their ills or how to fix Nigeria, the whole world will make sense if we start facing ourselves, start with you. As you mind yourself, be anxious for nothing, enjoy your everyday life and see the good in everything. People will not always agree with you, your choices even those who you feel are supposed to be on your side,you just have to believe in your self and keep moving. People don't trust what they cannot explain.Sometimes, its better not to care at all.
its a choice thing.....its up to you. As for me, i have made that commitment to live my best life. Life is short. Even GOD wants you to be the best. LIVE YOUR LIFE, YOUR BEST LIFE EVER!

Monday, December 20, 2010

RAT RACE....

Does that word sound familiar? i bet it does. We all know it and use it in sentences to buttress our points......but how many of us know we are in that race? like it or not, many of us are in that race? the LONGMAN DICTIONARY OF CONTEMPORARY ENGLISH describes rat race as this: "The unpleasant situation experienced by people working in big cities, when they continuously compete for success and have a lot of stress in their lives". So, even If you do not know that word, the dictionary has helped us to make it easy. It is so pathetic, very pathetic how we just run around everyday hustling and many of us are like slaves, like what one writer calls modern slavery. We continually find a reason to stick in there, we live in denial enduring stuffs we know we are better off without them. What are we so afraid of? We fear risks and instead of breaking free, we just limit ourselves.
Obviously, we like the rat race, or am i getting it wrong? people complain about everything, even their jobs but are the willing to walk away from it? no way, how will they survive? yeah, yeah, thats the whole cycle. people continually find a reason to endure, play it safe and wait for the right time for things to happen, they wait till they have saved enough, before you know, they are forty years old and some take their frustrations on their young kids who want to escape the lives their parents have lived.
For many people, career is being all dressed up with id cards and tagging your life on to one big company. The "prestige" of saying i work with this or that company, hang out with colleagues, earn some money and spend.....in the end, you have lived the most active part of your life being a slave to someone at the expense of your dreams in a bid to keep body and soul together. People just want to endure, they keep complaining but lack the courage to walk away and if you miss your way to tell them, you want to quit, they begin to tell you, how bad the economy is, why you should wait and the truth is, they will never share in your frustrations. They tell you, they understand and why you should be patient but they never follow you to work 12-14 hours. They really love you, don't you agree? telling you to endure what they never will, so much for the advice.
Life is basically choice, if you know what you want, you will get on with it. We have to tell ourselves the truth fa i just made one and know how it feels. In fact, they leave you with no friends, people will mock you for being so stupid leaving your lucrative career....but if you can make that choice, take that step, face your fears, you will get through. Ask FELA DUROTOYE and CHIMAMANDA ADICHIE, ask BASKETMOUTH and ask the average guy with a white collar job. Its not in carriage, its not in your paycheck, lets stop screaming careers like we really have one. we just get all dressed up in the morning, join the rest of the population in the race, walk tall with head high but deep down we are empty,coming home tired and wake up he next day into the same life. No time to focus on what is essential in this life but vanities. we run after things that has no eternal reward, we become selfish trying to find fulfillment in material things....just follow the bandwagon but no destination, roaming and roaming! we measure success by competing with others and we use people as a yardstick for what is really cool. we just become exhausted, running after degrees, all kinds of stuffs and we never get to have a life. We miss out on the simple miracles of everyday life, laughter, sunshine, family, friendship because we all working our asses off to fit in,to be classy and have it all. We are never satisfied. The only way out of rat race is to figure what you enjoy and make it happen.
we really should be tired of running this rat race. The average white collar faithful has watched all the seasons of THE APPRENTICE with Donald Trump, they know all the great Authors but thats how good it goes, nothing happens, its still the same rat race.. Are you not tired of reading all the books, be caught in the moment of adrenalin rush the books give you only to go back to the same life, running to the office, frustrated doing the same thing waiting for salary.You just tell yourself, one day, it will all over, you plan waiting for the right time, you never enjoy the cash because for the most part you are saving but then that day never comes,before you know, you are forty years old. we should never settle for less. set out to be the best and never limit yourself. Stop making excuses for things that are not working in your life. Stop wishing, make it happen for yourself. If you know truly, you are not happy, stop living in denial and face it. Its the least you can do for yourself. tell yourself, you deserve better, do away with thoughts that keep you down, people who that limits you to a mediocre, whoever they are. there is only one life and its up to you. As for me, i have made my choice and am sticking with it. I am getting a life for myself. Doing what i love....the cash will come, its the only way to be alive. I am tired of running the rat race!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

SEXINESS or NAKEDNESS?

I was in a bus the other day and i saw this girl on a bike with a low waist jeans, her backside was OMG!.....ouch! her string was all out and was still dirty. Arrghhhhh! i felt really embarrassed, not because of self-righteousness but some body parts are better covered, you could hear all the wild comments guys were making.....it happens to most of us. Naked women are everywhere, even in places of worship and they really rock! I just do not know how to contain my shame sometimes,you will be so shocked at how even older women old enough to mother ladies of my age dress and even big magazines use them as yardstick for saying what is good. We mix fashion with madness. we spend so much money shopping, all those stupid clothes are even more expensive but we hardly wear clothes, we are rarely covered. Being a girl is super cool.....and i love it but am not sure if sexiness is nakedness. its definitely not, i say that with no apologies.
My people, am wondering what is being Sexy anyway? does sexiness means nudity? someone please talk to me. I hear sex sells....and i am beginning to fully understand how that happens. women are beautiful creatures but i do not get why we have to be sex objects....people cannot define sexiness without naked women.... the men are forever covered, designers make skimpy women clothes, lyrical content of some songs makes it appropriate and women are fans of such dirty lyrics. Everywhere you turn, its naked women, pretty ladies dressed half naked, all kinds of boob jobs to feel sexy.....i really do not know how to understand what women have become. we can still cover our selves and feel sexy, forget all those stuffs on TV, they do not always make sense. the truth is, less is more! some parts are better covered.
Its no man's fault....we love it as women, what do you expect? the world will find a way to help us love it even more. no day passes without u seeing a naked woman on TV, there is always someone willing to it. The biggest celebrities do it, they are models for millions of women and nudity is a fast way to cash in....the pay is good. what can i say? Some baby girls' clothing are that way, boys are all covered.
guys have themselves all covered and even in musicals, the girls are the ones who have to roll their butts, spice up the screen.....its like being an object. i quite do not understand. Most times, what we see on screen as sexy girls in bikinis are just hungry looking girls, who have been photo shopped.all kinds of emptiness on the screen and tabloids, i do not know how they want us to follow those people, where are we headed? all those kind of lifestyles that does not add anything to our lives in the long run is a waste. the funny thing is that Nudity as well as pornography is taking all kinds of form,they are gradually creeping into our lives and they always appear harmless....that will be what casting crowns sang as slow fade. The world loves it, dirty, stupid stuffs....sex sells!
Being sexy should have a better definition, it should really make sense because sexiness is not in boobs, asses and plastic.... its an attitude! you can still be sexy, fun and have men all over you (if thats how you build your self esteem as a woman), be pretty and still be covered. i do not subscribe to naked women, you can wear all the clothes in all the styles and still be cute. This is not about religions, it is beyond that.
Sexiness has definitions, in fact, being naked has become a choice but you see, for me....its an attitude and it goes with what you have in your brain.

HOW WHITE IS YOUR COLLAR?

The last time i was on leave, i took my CV around Lagos, to see what i could get, a better job perhaps but the whole thing is just so difficult and that gave me a hint of what the unemployed experience. its complete nonsense! The rate of unemployment is alarming in NIGERIA.....its just pathetic! People roaming the streets to get a job. applicants are sometimes left with the choice to settle for less and even with that choice, where are the jobs?
When i was in school, it was so much about the grades, its almost like your life and your success in life is tied to it....thats what they tell you,but in the end life outside the citadel of learning is a whole new experience.our schools are not doing much to educate students about the real world and parents do not make it happen often. There is so much preference for white collar jobs like they always make sense. They magnify it, paint it and just make students relish it but in reality, you are better off doing what you love. working for money will not take you far, in the long run, you get stuck in a circle, roaming around the same place and your dreams fade before your very eyes. many white collar jobs make promises and make it look rosy but its obviously a case of modern day slavery. many people do not enjoy what they do, deep down they know that but you see, they continually live in denial, they find a reason to justify and endure.
when you are an applicant, they invite you for test and make it look like you will be so lucky to work with them, you write the aptitude test feeling and praying your heart out....when you finally get that "big shot", you soon realize, its a circle and as long as you have human elements, there will be selfishness and eye service.
Sometimes, when you are good at what you do, you become a threat to people, that Is why mediocrity has eaten deep into the fabrics of our society. WE PREACH EXCELLENCE but in some cases, superiors will find a way to counter subordinates even when it can move the establishment forward or they just do it and take the glory.
People have to stop worrying about white collar jobs especially if you are an applicant and you are tired, look for it elsewhere because, the frustrations on many white collar jobs are heartbreaking.They promise but they do not deliver half of it. the job functions most times have nothing to do with the aptitude tests, it is basically common sense. they just do not want to employ the reason, they make the conditions hard, not because you are not qualified or good enough. How many of this employers were first class products, they just magnify themselves, tell their employees to continually paint the company good.its true, an employee should pay allegiance to the employer, great way to be employed but for the most part its all a mirage.it is just no use hustling MBA all in a bid to look for a better job. you are better of as your own boss. many people just get a job and the excitement of that first blinds them, all sorts of incentives that blocks your reasoning as an employee and when you try to break away, you are labeled a rebel and you usually do not have friends. in fact, the time it takes to rise up the ladder is just too much a time. the best thing is to have a plan, as soon as you starting a job, define how far you want to stay and the experience you want, then move along. As long as you an employee, you are limited. No matter how rich you are, no matter how many zeros your account is reading, the man at the top calls the shot. the reality about life is that working for someone is good because you need that experience to grow and you need the cash to settle your bills. it is also important to switch jobs and expand our horizon. whatever you decide, i want to say... when it is a job, it is for the money and whatever does not translate to cash is nothing. it is the reason you want the job but you cannot continue to work for someone all your life. Even if at all you have to work, make sure you are doing what you love.
People always settle for less in life, what is the point continually doing something you do not love? when you have reached the point of saturation, you will understand that no amount of money can fill that emptiness, you will never be satisfied like when you do what you love for free. most people are not willing to let go, they are so terrified of being out of the job, of being without money and you see, employers know this and they cap on it. i agree, its just hard being without money but let the truth be told. Tell yourself, you deserve better because even God wants the best for you. do not be afraid to take risks, to live your life, to be who you want to be. make up your mind to rise above mediocrity, to move up away from the average life, its one life. you do not have forever. Many of the big shots made up their minds and walk into what they wanted and today, you are running after them for jobs. stop looking for white collar jobs, learn a trade or a craft, improve on your skills and find a way to reach people it does not matter how little you earn as your own boss, you are better off,you are in charge and you have a life. earning salary will never make u rich, except you want to settle for less.
This piece is a familiar topic am sure because we hear successful people tell us, we hear it everyday. we even know it is true that you are better off doing what you love. if you are working a white collar job and you are so taken by that job, i want to ask, how white is your collar? all these carriage we form, all these fake lives we are living is no life at all.
This has to translate to my personal life otherwise, it will be a waste writing this.My Life has to reflect it......that is integrity. I am starting out as a blogger and i know how much satisfaction this gives me. Life is about planning, i am not saying you should jump out of your job but you need a plan. you need a direction on the life You want and be determined to have it. it is not easy...it is plenty of work but do not just sit there and know what is right, do something about it.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

people and eyeservice....

The society is so taken by eye service....people do not even know what they want. they sell themselves short, do all silly stuffs to be noticed, it is so dry....ouch! some practically do it as a way of playing smart but i just see it as a way of becoming a low life! selling your self short! you do not need to become that little. people do not need to always like you, they only need to respect you. that is key! you do not even need to practice eye service, in fact, its not necessary. if you are good, there is no prejudice!
i just try to understand what the difference between eye service and courtesy really is. can someone help me out? it is what is killing our society and many people use that as a measure of loyalty, superiors fall fall for it. we always don't like blunt and truthful people....we want to be surrounded with people who always like us, people who treat us as kings..its a great thing but people that tell us the truth is very key, that is the reason why we roam around the same circle. we need people who are sincere, people who encourage you to face the truth about your life, the challenges, that is the only way forward. the year is ending and we will be bombarded with all kinds of resolution talk, planning of all sorts.... it really doesn't solve a thing, if we don't face the root cause.
The world is filled with lies, people tell lies with straight faces and selfishness is just human.
Eye service is a sibling to mediocrity, if you are ever going to excel, never sell yourself short, all in a bid to get another man's nod or be his expectations.... you will end up miserable. when there is something to be gained, he will stick his head out first.

is it really enough to dream?

Maxwell says talent is not enough and i agree. the level of mediocrity in our society kills everything. you need more that determination to pull through. it breaks your heart when you see that the people who are supposed to be the light, the direction are themselves lost. we have serious challenge in Africa especially with development. corruption has eaten deep into the fabrics of our society and its a shameful thing. everyday, its one summit or the other, all kinds of promises but its a mirage. we really should change our thinking and act on what we know to be truth, have a definition of what life is. these days it is not enough to dream....seriously, things at the top are entangled, people have lost focus and there is a feeling of doubt in our leaders..... its just really sad....but i know change is possible, i am certain, life can get better. its not about religion but we need to rise above mediocrity first in our personal life..its the first step! we are tired of backwardness, empty shallow promises, corruption...we deserve better.